"...and I might see you in my nightmare"

I'm giving up on giving up on boys. I had planned on bannishing the distraction-from-my-mission-causing asswads from my mental but I am failing epic-ly. And I hate it. I hate it so much that I had to blog about it. And I hate that I am about to dedicate yet another post to this bullshit exhausted ass topic. #thatsall

lol.

I've been listening to "See You In My Nightmares" by Kanye and Lil Wayne pretty heavy lately and .....Gosh, I'm such a fucking basket case. You ever try to make yourself NOT like someone? Shits harder than the SAT's.

I mean, let's back this up for a second. I really don't even think I like this jackass. What the hell does like entail exactly, anyways?  I mean, how can you like a person you don't even know like that? Right? Impossible. Maybe I like what I think he is. And what do I  think he is? Fucking awesome I don't know. Right now he is my fucking nightmare. I hate him. I need his head on a platter.

Uggghhhhhhhh.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

And here I am trying to break up with someone I never even dated. I need a shrink. I'm irreparably deranged. And this is why I hate it when I like someone. I like being romantically numb, like Gucci Mane says he is :). This shit is NOT in the game plan. Liking someone is not allowed on this newyorkcitymission. That wasn't on the itinerary. So what shall I do? I am going to commit every fraction of my existence to deleting this 'situation' from my memory. I have too much real shit on my agenda to be liking someone right now :)

excuses, excuses.

I wish Kanye was my friend in real life.

"Okay I'm back up on my grind
You do you and I'm just gon' do mine
You do you cause I'm just gon' be fine
O.kay I got you out my mind
And the night is young
The drinks is cold

The stars is out

I'm ready to go"